The other day, I was feeling discouraged. I couldn’t get my butt in the chair to work on any of my three works in progress … I had no ideas for my blogs and I had been rejected for a grant I had written for work. I was about ready to just say “to heck with it all I didn’t need it anyway!”
Then I received a phone call.
Now Susan was a friend of my husband’s. I don’t remember exactly when I last saw her — but my husband has been dead for more than 10 years so it has been a while. However, after my husband died I tried valiantly to write one of those holiday letters to let people know what was happening — especially those people that I didn’t often see. I called it, “The Dreaded Holiday Letter”. It took me a little while to write it because I didn’t want it to be too Lake Woebegon with all the children above average (though of course my children are!) and all the women are strong (though of course I am — there were a few years when I even attempted to toss cabers … you know, those telephone pole-like things, but that is another blog post!) — but getting back to “The Dreaded Holiday Letter” needless to say I wrote them for years.
Susan’s opening sentence was, “It is so good to finally speak with you and not play answering machine tag — I have to tell you that I have kept your “Dreaded Holiday Letter” and I was rereading them recently. You are such a good writer! I hope you are doing something with that!”
Wow … someone other than my mother who likes my writing? Someone who I didn’t ask, “What do you think of this?” and then wait anxiously as they scramble for something positive to say. She spoke from the heart and totally blew me away.
“Why yes Susan — I write blogs and I am trying to finish 3 WIPs. I really enjoy it.” Well at least now that I have received some encouragement! It has also made me think that I need to get my butt in gear and write a “Dreaded Holiday Letter” — I haven’t written one in years!
And so I learned — we are always talking with the critic: our self-critic that says we are unworthy, the critic that says our grant was horrible (not recognizing that they had so many requests they couldn’t possibly fill them all!), and the lack of time … if you really were passionate about it you would find the time or if you were good it wouldn’t take so much time. Rarely do we accept the notes of appreciation. But in those words we find hope, wonder and new begininings. Sounds like Spring has come early this year! I need a little HOPE!